Fighting against odds & succeeding
Abi Kalyan, founder and creative head of Thottil Maternity walked out of a 10 year abusive marriage. She was at zero and had no clue what to do at that time. Companies didn't offer her a job because of her career break. She was in a suppressed state keeping all the ideas and not having a space to express herself. Then, she took a social media marketing class and her mentor saw the spark and suggested put her ideas in Facebook, Instagram. Later, with her first collection, did an amazing shoot with her friends Smitha, Supraja and across her mentor's table with a box of laddoos started Thottil on Oct 3rd 2019.
In an exclusive conversation with 'The Hans India,' Abi shares about her journey. Let's have a look into it.
How did Thottil Maternityidea generated?
Thottil Maternity is a brand dedicated to new Mom's and Mom's to be. Thottil is about maternity clothing made to suit the unique and beautiful shape of a mother. Yes, our outfits can be worn through pregnancy and during feeding time too.
What do you mean by Thottil? Where did this name come from?
Thottil means cradle in Tamil. There is a saying "The hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world". There is a very similar saying in Tamil that starts with "Thottil". I wanted women to rule their world in Thottil outfits & feel great about themselves. And this is how Thottil Maternity got the name.
What's your main USP ?
Our main USP is our feeding outfits are made in such a way that they don't look like a feeding or a maternity wear at all. They are made from high quality fabric, and our finish if very high end too. For the stitching quality and value we give in outfits, we don't over price because it's a maternity wear. We make sure it's affordable too.
How you started off this business and what are the challenges you faced?
For an entrepreneur I think the challenge starts from starting the business itself. For me, at the beginning it was to convince my dad and mom about my passion to start this business, as they wanted me to find a job and stay secure, as business according to them is risky. What if I make a loss and so many more doubts. I told them that this was an idea in me since my son was born and for over nine years, I have been researching about it. I always knew there is more that can be given in this space. And I knew, I will be able to add my element and make a difference to mothers across the world through my work. So I told them, that I will give it a last try, three months if I don't sell the first set of products I made I will go back to my corporate job. With a little guts and loads of faith in my calling n passion, I began this journey pledging my jewellery for 1.5 lakhs and made my first collection and started Thottil Maternity In Oct 3rd 2019.
How do you inspire women in motherhood phase (which is very vulnerable)?
Motherhood clothing everyone told me is a very sensitive line I am choosing. But I have been a mother and I know how delicate and vulnerable a mom can be. Her world suddenly changes drastically. But this is when I wanted to be there for them. I always tell my team, when u pack add a little love, when a mother receives it she will feel it. And I have over thousands of mother's writing to us on how loved they feel when they receive Thottil Maternity package. For me Thottil is not just a Brand, it's an emotion. And we connect with every mom's deeply.
I love to write and it's been another passion of mine. And I make sure that every morning a Thottil Mom opens her insta, she will find an inspiring quote to read, to uplift her mood and to pull her up and I write them everyday on Thottil Maternity Instagram Page Story.
Who is your biggest inspiration and how do you tackle obstacles?
My biggest inspiration has been Oprah Winfrey, Priyanka Chopra and Indira Nooyi. I have listened to almost all their talks and even today their voice has always helped me build my Momentum in my day. Obstacles, according to me is a closed door, and I don't like to stop at a closed door. There is always a way and I just pause and find the best way forward.
What would you like to convey to single mothers like you?
This is to every Mother and women out there, why should we be dependent on someone either our husband or father or brother to take care of us and our children. If we can create a life from within us and nuture it, we also have the strength to create a life for ourselves and nurture us and our children too. Being a single mom or a wife in a marriage or a single women, being independent and financial stable is very important.
Can you tell us about your past and what made you to take divorce?
I had a love marriage but it was a very toxic one. I went through ten years of physical, verbal and emotional abuse from my husband. Things that kept me going through my darkest days was my son & all the learning and research I used to do on business of running a clothing brand.
In 2016 my husband's abuse was extreme and had multiple injuries due to broken glasses & extreme slapping. The only thing I requested him was not to verbally and physically abuse me in front of our son. But he refused it. One day, it became extreme for me, as his abuse was life threatening. I took a decision to walk out that day to protect my life and save my child from being brought up looking at his mother being beaten up. It was also the most divine & empowering day in my life as this huge decision has changed my life. In a hurry to leave the house and protect myself, I left behind my certificate, all my writings & learning and my son n my passport behind.
I filed for divorce and DV In the courts. It's been 7 years and I am still fighting for justice. I was asked to go to my home to take my documents and certificates. But by then, the father of my child removed every single documents and all my learnings and writings. All I wanted was only that as I was not working, had zero savings in my name, and was desperate to find a job and start my career.
How did you managed without certificates?
It was the worst. I had to run from pillar to post to apply for duplicates. I had no scanned copies with me. I wanted to do some masters degree but was not able to apply without my school certificates. It actually took one year for me to get my documents.
Why did you think of starting a maternity brand? Are you a fashion designer?
I have always been passionate about clothing, but maternity line gave me an excitement as it was full of challenges from the designs to the highly sensitive customers I had to deal with. I think it was also a connection I have with mothers and I knew I can make a difference to their motherhood phase.
Another important reason was my son. When I was carrying him, I felt very divine. I used to tell my mom that I never felt my foot on the ground. I don't know if I am carrying my son or if he is carrying me. And that's how I named my son. His names is "Devan" mean "God".
Tell us about your team
We have a full women team in my office. It's a all girls gang. And my tailors are all people who lost their jobs due to Covid and unable to take care of their families. I set up a unit near their homes and gave them a livelihood. And all through the pandemic, my Thottil Tailors were filled with work. And I think work and being active at this time helped them both financially and mentally kept them healthy.