Control emotions by pretending

Update: 2020-01-21 00:39 IST

Our emotional state influences us a lot more than we might like. I think as most of us know, if we are happy and motivated we get a lot more done than if we are bored, lazy or depressed. If we are confident and secure we can often make better decisions then when we are controlled by fear or nervousness.

One of the best ways to change our emotional state is to pretend we already feel the way we want to feel. So if you are feeling bored or unmotivated, simply pretend that you are incredibly driven and really motivated to get going. If you are feeling unhappy, then just pretend you are happy and it will start to change.

A study was conducted where there were two sets of participants. The first set of participants was asked to relive a particularly stressful situation. The other set was asked to simply make a facial expression that would display stress. Amazingly, both groups showed the same changes in body temperature and heart rate, which indicated an emotional response.

This shows us that our emotions can actually be influenced and even completely changed just by changing our facial expressions. So, if you want to feel better, just start laughing and smiling. Try it for a minute, right now.

I'm sure you noticed, as I did, that you felt a bit happier and more excited just by smiling and laughing. This works on a small scale for happiness, but this tendency for our emotions to be controlled by our physiology and actions extends even further. By pretending like we are confident, motivated or happy, we can literally create those emotions within us.

A lousy emotional state does not need to be long lasting. While using a technique such as this cannot solve your problems, it can give you the emotional motivation and supportive mindset so you can find those solutions.

A key to this technique working is you have to be willing to feel a little silly at first. Smiling and laughing when we feel lousy or walking around with our head up when we feel nervous often feels awkward at first. However, if you can stick with it, in a short time your emotions will start to adjust to the physiology you are displaying.

This technique of pretending can be extended to more than just emotional control. If you've been having trouble motivating yourself to start working on a task or chore, simply start doing it. Once you start doing it, use this technique to put yourself into a state of confidence, ease or happiness. Do this and you will find it is far easier to work on a task that you normally find boring or stressful.

In situations like that, it is usually best to make changing our state to be more positive should be our first priority. Whenever we are feeling depressed, angry or lazy, changing our state to a more neutral area will give us greater access to our problem solving skills. As long as we are in that bad emotional state, it is hard to solve the problems that got us there in the first place.

Realizing that our internal emotions, motivation, courage, happiness, are completely under our control is the start of achieving that control. As long as you believe that something good must happen in order for you to start feeling happy, it will be impossible for you to change your state. As long as you believe that you need some outside stimulus to become motivated about a goal or project, it will be very hard to create that motivation.

So, if you are having trouble controlling a particular emotion, start by changing your physiology. If you want to be happy, start smiling and laughing. If you want to be motivated stand or sit up straight and begin moving faster. Changing your physiology is the first step.

Source: www.scotthyoung.com

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