Learned Helplessness - How you’re unconsciously destroying your life

A university professor approached me with a complaint about her inability to break free from her marriage of 20 years. She revealed that she had been suffering due to her spouse’s behaviour for two decades. According to her, she endured constant criticism and belittlement in front of others, along with verbal abuse. Her husband resorted to physical violence when he was angry, leading to visible injuries that she showed me.

Despite her role as a professor with a substantial income, her husband had control over her finances. He only provided her a small sum for transportation each month, leaving her with nothing else. He managed the household but did not offer her any financial support. The primary reason for her visit that day was a severe altercation between them, during which she sustained significant injuries. Her friends advised her to file a complaint with the police, but she was fearful of doing so, even though her life was at risk. Her parents, who are elderly and financially challenged, were unable to step forward and offer support.

After discussing her personal and professional journey in depth, it became clear that her functioning was characterised by learned helplessness.”

What is learned helplessness? Earned helplessness occurs when someone repeatedly faces uncontrollable, stressfulsituations and does not exercise control when it becomes available.

They have “learned” that they are helpless in that situation and no longer try to change it, even when change is possible. Once someone with this experience discovers they cannot control events around them, they lose motivation. Even if an opportunity allows the person to alter their circumstances, they do not take action.

Individuals experiencing learned helplessness are often less able to make decisions.

Symptoms of learned helplessness:

• Feeling a lack of control over the outcome of situations.

• Failing to ask for help.

• Having low self-esteem.

• Decreased motivation.

• Putting less effort into tasks.

• Lack of persistence.

• Feelings of frustration.

• Passivity.

• Giving up easily.

• Cursing self.

• Give up trying to improve the situation.

• They believe their abilities are limited.

• They can survive independently.

If anyone is suffering from this state of situation, try to visit a professional psychologists for help. You can learn the strategies to empower self and become a decision-maker to progress in life to have quality of life.

The impact of LHS

The effects of learned helplessness can be extensive, impacting a person’s mental health; abuse and a pessimistic outlook may lead to suicidal ideation, troublesome relationships, and other aspects of life. It also increases the risk of stress, depression, and low self-esteem.

(To be continued…)