Relationship: Rebuilding confidence after emotional abuse

Update: 2023-09-26 10:18 IST

Emotional abuse is a silent and insidious form of mistreatment that can erode a person’s self-esteem, leaving them feeling broken and devoid of self-worth. For those who have experienced emotional abuse in a relationship, the journey to healing and rebuilding confidence can be arduous. However, with the guidance and support of a relationship coach, individuals can tap into the transformative power of self-care to reclaim their sense of self.

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It is a very serious topic, as emotional abuse is silent but hurts the sentiments of the other person. Abuse is just a word, but the sense of it in a relationship is very deep. It can manifest in various forms, including constant criticism, humiliation, isolation, gaslighting, and emotional blackmail. Over time, the victim of emotional abuse may internalise these negative messages, leading to a profound loss of confidence and self-belief.

Anjali Tyagi, a certified relationship coach, outlines some strategies for helping women combat emotional abuse in relationships and reclaim their confidence via the power of self-care.

Creating a Safe Space: One of the first steps in healing from emotional abuse is to provide a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to share their experiences and emotions. Relationship coaches offer this safe haven where clients can open up about their past trauma and feelings without fear of criticism, which develops a sense of safety and creates a comfortable environment for the people.

Self-Reflection and Awareness: Emotional abuse often leaves survivors with a distorted self-image. Relationship coaches help reflect on their strengths, values, and goals. Through introspection, individuals can regain a sense of self-awareness and begin to separate their identity from the negative messages they received during the abusive relationship.

Setting Boundaries: Emotional abuse often involves violations of personal boundaries. Relationship coaches work with people to establish healthy boundaries that protect their emotional well-being. Learning to say “no” and assert their needs is a crucial step in rebuilding confidence and self-respect.

Rebuilding Self-Esteem: Low self-esteem is a common consequence of emotional abuse. Relationship coaches guide in developing self-compassion and self-acceptance.

Identifying Self-Care Practises: Self-care is a cornerstone of healing from emotional abuse. Relationship coaches help to identify self-care practises that resonate with them, such as mindfulness, journaling, exercise, or creative pursuits. These practices promote emotional healing and boost self-confidence.

Establishing Support Networks: Isolation is often a tactic used by emotional abusers to maintain control. Relationship coaches assist in building a strong support network of friends, family, or support groups. Having a supportive community can be a lifeline during the healing process.

Developing Resilience: Emotional abuse survivors often grapple with feelings of vulnerability. Relationship coaches help in developing resilience by teaching coping strategies, stress management techniques, and emotional regulation skills. This resilience allows individuals to bounce back from setbacks and challenges with renewed strength.

Goal Setting and Progress Monitoring: Setting and achieving goals is a vital aspect of rebuilding confidence. Relationship coaches work to set realistic and achievable goals, whether they relate to personal growth, career advancement, or relationships. Regular progress monitoring keeps them motivated and focused on their journey to healing and self-empowerment.

“After experiencing emotional abuse, regaining confidence is a process that calls for endurance, self-compassion, and commitment to one’s own well-being. The potential of self-care to foster emotional healing and aid survivors of emotional abuse in regaining a sense of self-worth and self-belief is what gives it its strength. On this path, a relationship coach acts as a reliable friend and mentor, providing encouragement, advice, and skills that enable people to recover their lives.

Keep in mind that recovering from emotional abuse takes time, and it is acceptable to ask for assistance and help. In addition to regaining their confidence, survivors can come out of the shadows of abuse as stronger, more resilient people prepared to embrace a brighter future full of self-love and self-empowerment with the help of a relationship coach and a dedication to self-care”, concludes Tyagi.

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