Life's Like That: The art of conformity

All, most self-help books talk about is to be successful, standout, achieve goals and be ahead. Now, what about the rest of us who care a hoot for standing out, and would rather melt into the background, not get noticed, and prefer to let be. Isn't the world unfair to us. There are no awards for being there, doing our job and getting along with life without much fuss. And in this ever-demanding world, and with over expecting bosses at work place, where standing out seems to be more dangerous and in the direct line of fire; and outside where its easier to blend in with the group than become the centre of attention, which seems more like inviting trouble than anything else, what can one do?

Well it isn't definitely about being totally ignored. Who would want that? Ofcourse one can't totally forget you, but surely there must be a way to stay back yet be in the count, to be away from limelight yet be in consideration. How can one be there and yet not be?

Naomi Datta's humorous and sarcasm loaded book 'How to Be a Likeable Bigot', that calls itself a handbook for the savvy survivor also gives tips on acquiring the art of being normal. It says amongst other things – how to climb your way to corporate oblivion. You need to be a blur of vague congeniality: when people try to draw a mental image of you, it should be a pleasant haze. This will ensure that you always stay under the radar. This also means that glory will elude you, but you won't get taken down either. The aim is to proactively sideline yourself. In your obscurity you are self-made. And she goes on to give step by step procedure to approach the issue and give out steps to help you get unnoticed.

On a serious note, the trick is not to say nothing; in fact, it is to say as little as required and at a time it is needed to be said; to not speak out of the way, and not remain silent when you are expected to say something. Art of conformity is like a thin balance which is as complicated as the art of standing out.

Naomi also gives tips on being on social media. She says, you dont need to actually play a sport to enjoy it. She asks you to treat social media like a spectator sport. It is that space where divergent opinions clash, people bicker, argue, fight. And, instead of being an active participant, one can be passive, and yet be active by being neutral in your comments. You can choose a side to support, but learn to exit at the right time, and just enjoy the rest of the argument as a silent spectator.

Infact in today's divided world where much of time and energy gets spent on such social arguments, one can choose to be smart and coformity in such a case comes handy.