Are criticisms positive?

Are we really taught to understand communication well? Often we learn to communicate but are we really taught how to give out our opinions, views, suggestions, takes, biases, and parts in a way that they look positive rather than colored. Well it's both ways, we are also not taught to take criticisms well.

At a very early age we all start experiencing appreciation from our parents. We start loving our existence due to the fact that we see ourselves from their eyes. We are pushed in front of others to recite poems or dance or sing or perform something we are good at. As children we feel shy sometimes but we still start doing what we are told; just to hear those words of appreciation.

Over a period of time we get used to goodie talk so much from people around us that we dislike those moments, when we are told we are not good at certain things. Individuals tend to develop a psychological phenomenon of hearing good and disregarding what is not good. This becomes a subconscious registered practice in mind and sometimes we start to hate to hear anything negative about about us and feel disrespected when we are criticized or critically analyzed by anyone.

But actually the only simple way to grow faster in life is to hear criticisms at a young age and act according to them to develop and rectify certain skills and habits. Not just because it is an opportunity for a real self-improvement but for a reason that if the same things are to be changed or corrected at youth it becomes a big effort for an individual.

Like a child walking without putting his full feet on the ground will never get a confident walk and changing this habit when he is grown up, is like a lot of conscious effort to put in. Body postures like moving the leg whenever you are sitting, moving your hands unnecessarily, etc., shows timidity and restlessness. Looking here and there, instead of looking into the eyes of people, while talking, shows lack of confidence and is not considered a genuine expression.

We don't like parents or others nagging us for all these but the fact remains that they are valuable criticisms. Certain pronunciations which need to be corrected can help an early learning for a fluent diction and language modulation; which can later open doors towards wishful careers. Discipline of adhering to time to reach at interviews, meetings, etc shows how much a person values a habit of being on time.

Youngsters develop their skills for interview, group discussions, presentations, confidence building and language fluency when they start thinking of going for a job but if this was started early it would take less efforts and make a better deal. New Vistas could be tapped by working on these criticisms sometimes. We would realize the value of criticisms when we find them adding value to our skills. So welcome all criticisms in life because they actually can make us better day after day.

Of course having said that, I don't mean to give an ear to everything non-relevant but before avoiding be a chooser for those ones which can really make a difference in our lives. In any case whether all are useful or not can always be decided and then be chosen from and worked on. So why close a door of light for self-help? Whether you like it or not certain criticism on time management, organizational skills, trouble shooting, and communication are always helpful as soon as you come to know about them; if you don't want to struggle later in life. Because –"Criticisms are always positive if we remain receptive in using them for our self development. They not just enable us to be at same pace with world competition but also sight you your apparent grey areas and try turning them white.

So be wise to treat criticisms as positive and enjoy this process of learning as much as you enjoy appreciations."

(The author is the Performance Coach (www.shachi.co). For more questions you may write your questions on [email protected])