Raising suicide and mental health awareness: What is psychological prspective of anxiety?

Are you sure you did not take my mobile phone from my bag? Please give it back; it is a gift from my best friend, it is a precious and expensive phone, I can’t afford to lose it…. please return it. No, I am sorry I didn’t take it. Why will I take it? Don’t defame me! I have a lot of money to buy, don’t blame me for that silly phone. See don’t lie; Mr. shaker told me you had taken it from the bag.

There was a significant altercation between two PG students on the college premises. The issue went to the principal, who started enquiring about the mobile theft; the college faculty discussed it, and then they watched a video recording of the classroom. The recording clearly showed this incident, then he agreed and silently returned the mobile phone to his classmate.

The question arises, how come an adult can white lie about his action? We see these kinds of lying incidents we will be experiencing every day and have seen them in the history of the world by great business people, presidents of the countries. To explain this, we need to understand the psychological perspective of anxiety; whenever the brain experience anxiety, to support the brain and help to experience less pain, it takes the help of another root with less pain, called a defence mechanism.it is very common with many family, friends, and neighbours. Defensiveness is most often a response to criticism. It’s when people try to defend themselves from feeling angry, hurt, or ashamed when they perceive the other person as critical. Criticism may make the other partner feel anxious or worried that the other partner does not care for them.

Research from 2020 suggested that people use defensiveness to give themselves a break when they do something wrong. A person may become defensive because they’re:

• misrepresenting or forgetting what occurred

• diverting blame onto others

• afraid of losing reputation

• minimising the harm caused

• not ready to take responsibility

• disengaging from the situation

People may also become defensive due to anxiety. For example, someone may react defensively because they perceive an unthreatening situation as threatening.

Defense mechanisms are psychological strategies that are used by our unconscious mind to maintain our psychological well-being. They often distort or manipulate our experiences, perceptions, and thoughts to reduce feelings of anxiety. The most popular defences people automatically used are as below.

· Denial.

· Distortion.

· Projection.

· Dissociation.

· Repression.

· Reaction formation.

· Displacement.

· Intellectualisation.

How to communicate with a defensive person

Since you can’t always avoid conflict, it may be beneficial to consider these tips and tricks for communicating effectively, especially with someone defensive.

1. Grow your self-awareness. It’s best to grow your self-awareness before focusing on others’ reactions to conflicts.

2. Use ‘I’ statements. ...

3. Better stop talking and go away from the situation.

4. Not to compete with the person and situation

5. Try to make the person comfortable and Accommodate, within reason.

6. Learn to Compromise.

7. Collaborate to solve the conflict, and give safe space to them.

(Dr C Veerender, counselling psychologist (www.younme.co)