Some lessons learnt over my silver juble

It is very strange to know that with each passing day, nothing seems to change, everything seems to follow the monotonous routine, everything seems to be smooth and calm, but as we look back to few months and years, everything seems to have changed! Time flies so fast! Things change so abruptly! Life moves in a roller coaster way! People die, friendships turn sour, priorities change, dreams acctualize, but there is one thing that always remains same, that is "YOU". Eventhough your wishes change, desires change, persona changes, attitude changes but you will still be you till you kick the bucket! For the last two decades, everyday was a new lesson, a second chance to pick up the scattered pieces of life and give it a beautiful shape that withstands the storms to come! As I completd my silver jublee , there are some lessons I learnt in this span which I would like to share with the readers!

Lesson 1: Never Sacrifice your dignity for your destiny!
Life is nothing but a mirage of fake promises and broken dreams if you do not analyse it properly. Sometimes the "knights in shinning armour can turn out to be retards in silver foil!" Sometimes people compromise with their present in a view to perfect their future! People may come in your life as blessing or curse, keep your hearts open but most importantly keep your brains active! those cheesy chirpy words should certainly not flatter you as life is much more than just relying on words. Never trust people too much as Satan was also an angel once! In the same manner, Never play villian for others, you can either be a victim or vamp, try to be none. Never try to hurt others with your words or actions because certainly what goes around comes around! watch for yourself! No melodrama required!

Lesson 2: Never be dependent on anyone..simple rule..be independent!
Well, this lesson sounds to be an outcry of rebellion and contradiction. How can one not be dependent on others in this world? By independence I did not mean to completely forget the presence of others in their life, but strike a balance, know the difference between dependent and completely dependent. Unfortunately emotional dependence on others is what robs us off our sanity, this is the worst form of dependence, try to be strong enough to let go and welcome the new things. For women, stop fantasizing and enjoying life on your husband's money, create your own identity in this society, be financially independent, remember Khadija (R.A), she was one of the most powerful and wealthiest women of her time, so there is no such thing that says that you need not to support your husband financially, if he is willing to make you a part of his struggle, never retaliate!

Lesson 3: Sst some goals for your life before you turn 30..even if you are a woman!
No hard feelings, but I am pained to see that some people really need a mental makeover. The way they look at women, they concider them to be " paaon ki juuti", the fragile one! the delicate one! the gullible one! Not everyone, but bulk of them, they think that the only thing that women are born to do is to get married..and here ends her part in the story, never stop dreaming a new dream is what I beleive, no doubt marriage is an important part of your life but it is not the only part..set some goals for yourself, only two rules to acheive that, one study hard and other, study harder! You do not need to leave your homes to leave an impact on the world, sometimes revolution takes place by the manner you act and behave and inspire others! You can be a great reader, a great writer, a great teacher, a great educator just by spreading your message to the world!

Lesson 4: Never Give up...even if you lose your sanity!
It may sound cliche, but this is the only thing that sustains life! we all have some dreams that we want to acheive but fail, there are people we want to spend life with, but we fail, there are desires that are only killed in our minds, because we give up! I have had my share of broken desires, wanted to be a medico, wanted to be a journo later,BECAME NONE.. but this is life..it never stops testing you, it never stops shaking you, it never stops amusing you, but had I lived with the remorese of pain and guilt, I wouldnt have been able to take a step further, everything may not be good, but there is something good in everything, if you fail, there is a reason for it, but if you give up, you certainly lose your chance to be better version of yourself!
LESSON 4: NEVER FORGET YOUR FAMILY...MAKE THEM SMILE ALWAYS..
People love you for some conditions, but they do not. In every struggle of yours, in every decision of yours, in every challenge you face, they have your back! vey unfortunate that we do not realize their value on time, because we are too busy with our own lives! I have come to realize that the only thing that matters at the end is your family. Never ever compromise anything for their happiness.

Lesson 5: Make few friends...but for life
You may have thousands of friends in your virtual life, you may have thousands of followers counting on you, but when you are sitting in a corner on some painful, lonely ,dark phase of your life, none of them is going to come to your rescue, it is only some true friends who are there to listen to the dark side of your story! Thankfully I have my share, I cannot boast of having a very interesting and exciting social life, but certainly the presence of a best friend compensates that! I beleive in quality of friendship not in quantity, which is the sole reason I distance myself from society. Not everyone deserves your love and care and not every person you meet deserves to be called your friend, give this previlege to special few in your life and make sure they always stay!

Lesson 6: Life is never fair..still it is beautiful
In every phase of our life, we face a setback, when we are young, we fight for good grades, then as we grow, we fight for a good career, then we fight for a good match, then we fight for the luxuries of our family, in short we have to fight with life at differnt stages and different intensities. Sometimes all we get is rejection and dissatisfaction from life, which makes it hard to live with the reality, but nothing to woory, someday everything will start making sense and every lesson learnt transforms your reality! sometomes all these disturbances lead to a beautiful conclusion! just wait and watch!

By Azra Mufti